And so it begins.

This is the time of year when my job revs into high gear. In fact, I have a grant application and/or update due every Friday until June, an event planned for every month through December, and at least one meeting a day from now until the end of time.

The events are certainly a mixed bag this year! We have the:
obligatory Golf Tournament in June,
hosting a conference on infant mental health in July,
a Motorcycle Poker Run in August,
A Night at the Races (horse racs where participants "buy" the horse) in September
a HUGE event of epic proportions involving Casey Jones (one of Washingtonian Magazines top 100!) in October,
the setting up of the Festival of Lights in November,
the running of said Light Festival in December along with the Christmas Party for 300 children (ACK) and the initiation of First Night on December 31.

I will be sooooo ready for Italy in January!

Adam in Iraq

To see some pics of Adam in Iraq click here

Pandora's Box

I have seen the enemy and it is my closet.

I am simply dismayed at the amount of brown clothes I own. Don't get me wrong, brown is good, I look good in brown, brown is my friend. But I only have ONE yellow sweater in a sea of brown. Oh yes, there is the ubiquitous black and white, some navy (no baby blue for me I look pale and unusual in baby blue) quite a bit of red, and a lot of coral and turquoise, but brown seems to dominate. I mean, I have 5 brown tank tops; all various shades of brown. We are not talking just my fall and winter wardrobe here either. Brown is a big player in my spring and summer stuff as well.

This is sad indeed.

Therefore, I resolve to but the kibosh on brown clothing for the next four monthes. Steve always steers me to more color (periwinkle, I believe, is his favorite color on me) and I am going to follow his suggestions from now on. Of course, his suggestion will be that I put the kibosh on shopping as a whole. Silly boy.

The good news is that I have arranged my closet in such a way that even my little friend Abby would be proud of! Suits and dresses on one side, pants and skirts on the other followed by blouses; everything grouped by color, natch. Shoes on racks and arranged by color and function. Purses artfully arranged on the shelves along with the scarf/pashmina (are we supposed to be still wearing those? I do every once in a while and the Fashion Police haven't given me a citation yet) stack.

So see what the red shoes hath wrought? Organization at its finest.

Off to buy some colorful clothes....

SICK in LOVE

So, on the advice from my youngest daughter, I have purchased a pair of red patent leather flats. I am sick in love with them and I think I am going to wear them every day for three weeks just like I would if I were 4. They are just that freakin' cute.

On other fronts, I did not experience any "educational" conversations like I had yesterday. Granted, it would be hard to top that one.

I did have the opportunity to sit out on the deck at the Crooked i at Chesapeake Beach with my shoes off and enjoy an iced tea (working - no toddy for the body when working) while watching the sail boats on the Bay. That was a little slice of heaven.

Off to coordinate my entire wardrobe around my new shoes...

Behold: the cutlet

Just when you think it's safe...

You get a phone call to have a meeting at (drum roll please) Hooters.

Yes, I travel in the classiest of circles where we meet in refined establishments of grace and decorum.

I was early ("To be early is to be on time. To be on time is to be late.T o be late is unacceptable." words to live by and engrave upon your heart,) so I went in and waited for the other parties to arrive. Turns out that it was a slow day at the Hooters in Waldorf so a waitress or three sat down to chat with me. Apparently I was an oddity in their world. Go figure.

It was a fascinating conversation quite frankly and I am not being facetious. Did you know that they make these things called a "chicken cutlet" to go in your bra to push everything up? It LOOKS like a chicken cutlet. Now who do you think the first gal was to rumage through her 'frig and think, "Hmmm...this chicken cutlet is just the thing to make my chest ever so perky!" and then proceeded to put the damn thing in her bra? She must not have been too stupid because now she is raking in the bucks from her faux poultry boob enhancers sold to Hooter girls and God Knows Who Else.

The meeting went well - Hooters is doing all of the food for free for our Motorcycle run in August. They even offered me a free Hooters shirt.

I declined. I just don't think I can pull it off in quite the same manner they did.

Meh

This day is shaping up to be a non-event. Don't get me wrong - non-events are a good thing in my world these days.

I bought the famous Apples to Apples game this week and am planning a game night either tomorrow night or the next week-end. I think we all need a little frivolous entertainment in our lives right now with all that is going on in our world.

I am still planning on seeing the plasticized body exhibit this week-end. This has completely squicked everyone out. I think it will be fascinating. It had better be, because tickets are not cheap!

Unfortunate Sharpie Girl has been out sick most of the week, so I cannt regale you with stories of her latest antics. The Grasshoppers have been shopping with increasingly better choices than their original "Forever 21" legless tights and baby doll tops. At least they have not worn any of that nonsense to work lately. My work with them has been personally fulfilling. While not being little Ann Clones, they have risen above the Let's-all-dress-like-Brittney! mindset. The Executive Director even commented on their improved appearance. I just nodded sagely and smiled to myself.

Tonight is the night!

In an entertaining evening illustrated with video clips, Paula Deen shares her infectious laugh, unabashed love of comfort food, and life's pure enjoyment with radio talk-show host Jim Bohannon

Planning an educational Saturday

This coming Saturday, Steve will be attending some fascinating meeting on church finances at the Cathedral. I on the other hand will be broadening my educational horizons.

I plan to twirl through the Corcoran in the morning, and I will be attending this exhibit as well.

At 4 o'clock I am going to try to return to the Cathedral for the annual Kirkin o' the Tarten. This is the annual traditional blessing service of Scottish Tartans with bagpipes and drums.

Then I am going to go home and watch re-runs of Americas Funniest Home Videos to suck some of the smart cells out of my brain and balance things up.

A Prayer for Virginia Tech

Almighty God, look with pity upon the sorrows of your
servants for whom we pray. Remember them, Lord, in mercy;
nourish them with patience; comfort them with a sense of your
goodness; lift up your countenance upon them; and give them
peace; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

Taken from the Book of Common Prayer, 1979
Prayers for Vigil at time of Death

Kitchen stuff

Stolen from Mrs. Badger

In the kitchen with...Ann

Variety is the spice of life.
In my cupboard, I have this many spices: 2,000? I don't know. too freakin' many some days.
Rack or no rack? no rack - racks are for wimps and people WAY more organized than I
Alphabetize? HAHAHAHA!
Which spice do you use most often? Assuming salt and pepper don't count: taragon, wait - basil(fresh please), then again there's marjoram. I cannot pick one of my little friends. It would be like picking my faorite pair of shoes.
Which recipe? Have you met me?

It's like the pot calling the kettle black.
Coffee or tea? Tea
Do you make coffee at home? Steve makes coffee. I have no idea how to make coffee and have to call someone else everytime I attempt it.
If you make tea, loose or in bags? Both.
How many kinds of tea do you have? between 1 and 49

If you can't stand the heat, get out of the kitchen.
I use my stovetop: every day.
I use my oven: several times per week.

Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?
Soy or cow? None for me, thanks.
Skim or whole? skim is what's in the frig
How many gallons a week? 1/4 at the most

Three items in my freezer (right now):
Vodka
soft shell crabs
cookie dough

Three things in my fridge (right now):
white truffle oil
Olives
crab dip

Item I am most chagrined about:
anything that I have thawed out, changed my mind about cooking that day and left to go bad. Boo!

Item I bet noone else has:
Fresh block of New York White Cheddar purchased at the Eastern Market this week-end

Sad news

HONOLULU - Legendary crooner Don Ho, who entertained tourists for decades wearing raspberry-tinted sunglasses and singing the catchy signature tune "Tiny Bubbles," has died. He was 76.

He died Saturday morning of heart failure, publicist Donna Jung said.

Ho had suffered with heart problems for the past several years, and had a pacemaker installed last fall. In 2005, he underwent an experimental stem cell procedure on his ailing heart in Thailand.

Ho entertained Hollywood's biggest stars and thousands of tourists for four decades. For many, no trip to Hawaii was complete without seeing his Waikiki show _ a mix of songs, jokes, double entendres, Hawaii history and audience participation.

Shows usually started and ended with the same song, "Tiny Bubbles." Ho mostly hummed the song's swaying melody as the audience enthusiastically took over the familiar lyrics: "Tiny bubbles/in the wine/make me happy/make me feel fine."

Combine this news with the fact that it is tax day and there is no real reason to get out of bed today.

And what kind of day are you having?

I thought I was having a good one, but then Blogger ate my previous post. Apparently it was not blogger worthy, and therefore, was banished. That's OK - it really wasn't some of my better work.

Speaking of work, I am back at the grindstone today. The only thing that is making it bearable is that I have lots of Tito Puente on my iTunes today. That, and the fact that it is Friday the 13th so I am giving all the therapists a rash of stuff about all of the crazies they will have tonight while they are on call. They come in here to dance around to my Tito music and, so, I must abuse them. It's the price they pay for basking in my hipness (in reality, it is the price they pay for basking in Tito's hipness. I am merely hip by association).

Unfortunate Sharpie Girl actually came in and told me that she was glad I was back and seem to be feeling better. AND she did not have on her fake pony tail thing today and I complimented her on her hair (that whole positive reinforcement crap don't you know). She seemed somewhat pleased and left before saying anything that made me want to rip her lips off. SUCCESS!!!! By this time next year she will be an elegant young woman with impecible taste and class - my own little Eliza Doolittle!!!

I am officially sick

I have been to the doctor and it is been confirmed that I am officially sick. Now I can get down to the real whining.

I have an antibiotic and some cough medicine that will Help Me Sleep. I think that this is code for: "You are going to take this, fall into a deep coma-esque sleep and have incredibly freaky dreams. But you will feel better when you wake up four days from now."

Cool.

WANTED: Nursemaid

Wanted: one nursemaid for 46 year old big baby

Qualifications: Must be able to withstand pitiful whining about not feeling good. Ability magically appear with a new kleenex box and a glass of orange juice a plus. Shark soup preparation non-negotiable. (if you do not know what shark soup is, please do not apply)

Education: MD required as patient is clearly a delicate flower; unless you are my mom or husband. Then you have the innate ability to make it all better.

Salary: my undying gratitude. In the case of Steve Seely, turn about is fair play.

Fax resume and 37 references to BR549, attention Big Whiny Baby.

A side trip down memory lane

I just found out that it is the 60th Anniversary of "Good Night Moon."

I cannot recall how many times I read:
"Goodnight room. Goodnight moon.
Goodnight cow jumping over the moon.
Goodnight light, and the red balloon..."
to a sweet sleepy child. I know that Erin, stickler for detail that she is, would always catch me if I tried to leave anything out. John Forrest would have preferred the Bruno the Beagle book, but was a good sport about hearing another story.

I understand that the book has been made into a video. I think is a crime against humanity and whoever came up with this horrible idea should be spanked and sent to bed with absolutely NO story.

Thanks Sweet Pea and Doodle Bug for giving me those nice memories.

Hallelujah

Next year at Old Durham...

Oh you got to have friends!

This morning, after a glorious Easter, I returned to work and joined in a discussion on "The Sound of Music," which was on last night. I mentioned that it was the first movie I ever saw in a theatre. One of the more unfortunate people who work here (unfortunate for me anyway) commented, "Damn! How hold ARE you!?!?"

Gasps were heard throughout the building.

One of my little therapist friends (the one who bought the black wedge sandal like a good little grasshopper) jumped in the middle of all that and read her the riot act! I mean the tent was up and people were coming to Jesus - it was that good of a rave.

And then Grasshopper said the most cutting thing she could think of: "And you can't have lunch with us ANYMORE!"

This nearly did me in - I just started cracking up!! Shunned from the lunch table - the SHAME!

I told them that if they did not act nice that I was going to make them HOLD HANDS FOR THE REST OF THE DAY. And you know I will, don't you children of mine? I told them I was even going to make them hold hands at the MALL like I did my kids when they acted like goobers. I even offered to let them use my cell phone to call my children to verify that, yes, I had indeed scarred my children's psyches by making them hold hands when they were fighting. They were no end horrified and fussing abruptly stopped.

Then Unfortunate and I (did I mention that she is also Sharpie girl? Yes, she is the Unfortunate Sharpie Girl) had a chat about why she is always making a big deal about my age and I think that we came to an understanding. More to follow....

A rant

Yes, I know that I have blogged today, but Erin will just have to suffer through because I need to put this out in the world.

Actually this is all Erin's fault because she told me that she had an Easter egg party at her house on Thursday evening for someone who had never dyed eggs before. (There's a lot that could be ranted about there, but I digress).

I decided that I would dye some eggs to use along with the pansy centerpiece for tomorrow's event. We all know how I love Easter. It rivals Christmas and that is certainly saying something since we all know what a fool I become at that time of the year.

Like Christmas, there are certain things that should never be changed about Easter. Just like you don't all of the sudden change Santa Clause to Santa Herman, you do not change the names of the colors in the Easter Egg dying kit. Is nothing sacred to you people (you meaning the people at Paas)? Blue is blue. Don't be changing it to "denim." "Teal" does not mean green. What are we going to do when the children of America go to school and tell the teacher that the Blue card she is holding up is "denim?" Are we changing Orange to "pumpkin?" Purple to "aubergine?" WHERE DOES IT END?

I say right here and right now. Join with me in my letter writing campaign to change the colors back to their real names. Here's the address:

PAAS
c/o Signature Brands LLC
100 South Fourth Street, Suite 1010
St. Louis MO 63102
1-877-726-8793


Teal indeed.

Strange and wonderous things to behold here in Southern Maryland

We woke up today to 2 inches of snow. While this is a boon for those seeking brightly colored eggs, it does not bode well for the super fantastic leopard peep toe wedges that I was planning to wear with my Easter ensemble. Yeah, that's right... Lent is OVER baby!

On to other sights that amazed and confounded:

Yesterday while driving through La Plata, minding my business like I always do, I saw something that was at the same time hilarious and very sad: a gentleman on a Hover-round going through the drive through window at the liquor store. I am choosing to think that he does not do this on a daily basis, just for special celebrations throughout the year. Because if I thought this man hovered to the brew through on a daily basis it would make me very sad indeed.

Abby, I am waiting on pins and needles for the Sephora report - don't leave me hanging!

Sad but true

OK - so I am slowing down

Apparently, some people think that I am blogging way too often these days.

It is just that I have a lot to say and so I do.

But in the interest of some people, I will slow down to no more than once a day.

I must warn you: Those posts may become epistles. Just sayin'...

The Rev. David MacDonald pours holy water on a 15-foot Celtic cross that had just been unveiled by Gloria Heisserman on Sunday at Christ Church, Durham Parish in Ironsides. Raymond Cannetti of St. Mary’s City carved the cross from a 3,600-pound block of Indiana limestone. Jon Dye of White Plains did the drawings. Heisserman and her husband, Bill, own the Solid Rock Co. and donated the stone to the church in memory of their daughter, Kristin, who died in a car accident at age 24. The designs in the cross represent not only Celtic tradition, but that of Charles County, with crabs, sturgeon and even a tree frog and mayfly.

Ornament of the World

Finished this last night. It is all about the Andalusian area of Spain where for 700 or more years Jews, Christians, and Muslims lived in peace and the strides that were made in many areas such as science, philosphy, medicine, mathmatics, etc by this co-habitation. Nothing like a good Inquisition to ruin the mood.

Andalusion poetry (yes you can find this on i-tunes) sounds very much like how the Psalms were probably originally sung, and flamenco came from this area.

This is the end of today's lesson!

Now I am reading some fiction: The God of Animals. I will, of course, let you know what I think.

The end is near

For all of you that haven given up something for Lent, you will be happy to know that Lenten fasting ceases after Good Friday services.

I just hope that the stores are open late enough for me to purchase these super fantastic incredibly frivolous shoes from Dolce and Gabbana. I think they are just the thing after a long shoe drought.

Just for my little friend Abby

Professional Mini Heated Lash Curler
This can't-live-without lash innovation is perfect for curling stubborn straight lashes anytime, anywhere.

Simply turn on, wait 15 seconds, place comb directly onto lash line above lashes, gently lift and comb lashes into the desired shape (as you would with a mascara brush), hold for one or two seconds, then release. Repeat across lashline until the desired effect is achieved.

Just in case the hair dryer thing doesn't pan out.

Are you taking Friday off to attend this most monumental moment in Memphis history?

Another silly meme

10 FAVORITES
Favorite Color: yellow has been my favorite color my entire life I think.
Favorite Food: I am sorry there is no way I can narrow it down to one - raw oysters are at the top
Favorite Month: November
Favorite Song: Of all time? or currently swirling around in my head? How can I answer these things if I don't know the real question here?
Favorite Movie: Princess Bride ("Prepare to die")
Favorite Sport: football
Favorite Season: fall
Favorite Day of the week: Friday
Favorite Ice Cream Flavor: anything with chocolate
Favorite Time of Day: Right when the sun is about to set and I am snuggled up on the couch with a fabulous book and an adult beverage in hand

9 CURRENTS
Current Mood: meh
Current Taste: What? What does that mean?
Current Clothes: beige jeans, black long sleeve T with skull-cross-bones-heart thing going on, jean jacket, black ballet flats
Current Desktop: Picture of Steve feeding Theo chocolate pie
Current Toenail Color: Opi "I'm really not a waitress" red
Current Time: 12:57 p.m.
Current Surroundings: my extremely messy office
Current Thoughts: It is 80 degrees outside. MAN I wish I wasn't at work!

8 FIRSTS
First Best Friend: Christy Chavez
First "date": I am sure that involved some dance at Del Crest Junior High
First Screen Name: Transplanted Okie
First Pet: a dog
First Piercing: both ears
First Crush: Billy Montgomery, kindergarten boyfriend
First CD: don't remember.
First Broken bone: none

7 LASTS
Last Cigarette/Cigar: I remember having a Macanudo after one of the golf tournaments at Quail Creek, but I don't think I have indulged since then.
Last Car Ride: Coming back to work from lunch
Last Kiss: Right before I left home to come to work.
Last Movie Seen: at the theater? Chronicles of Narnia
Last Phone Call: Nick Harville from one of my committees giving me a rash of crap for beating him out of getting a donation from someone (it was a good thing!)
Last CD Played: "Chick Music" of my own personal making

6 HAVE YOU EVERS
Have You Ever Dated One Of Your Best Guy/Girl Friends: define "dated"
Have You Ever Broken the Law: yes
Have You Ever Been Arrested: not so far
Have You Ever Skinny Dipped: many times
Have You Ever Been on TV: yes
Have You Ever Kissed Someone You Didn’t Know: squick. OK how about I have I ever kissed someone I thought I knew and them they turned out to be a total a$$hat? That's a question I can get behind.

5 THINGS
Thing You’re Wearing: earrings
Thing You’ve Done Today: oh dudes, WHERE DO I START?
Thing You Can Hear Right Now: The therapists party it up in the lunch room
Thing You Can’t Live Without: family
Thing You Do When You’re Bored: Watch TV

4 PLACES YOU’VE BEEN TODAY
1. Home
2. Work
3. CVS
4. That covers it

3 PEOPLE YOU CAN TELL ANYTHING TO
1. Steve
2. Betty
3. Alicia

2 CHOICES
1. Black or White: black
2. Hot or Cold: hot

1 THING YOU WANT TO DO BEFORE YOU DIE
Spoil my grandchildren.

Sharpies

I love Sharpies. I'm serious. I love Sharpies! They come in all colors, they come fat and uber-skinny, they write on everything. What's not to love?

Having cleared up that I hold nothing against Sharpies themselves, I will tell you what you should NOT use a Sharpie for: eyeliner.

No, I didn't do this, but one of the brain trusts that work here has announced that she is using a fine line Sharpie for eyeliner these days. I haven't looked closely, but I think she is using black. I would not put it past her to get one of those multi color packs and match her eyeliner to her shirt.

Next she will be using the brown one to outline her lips and fill in with her extremely frosted pink lipstick. Or fill in her eyebrows. or draw big red circles on her cheeks for "blush."

Maybe I will suggest these beauty tricks to her because that would just be too good to be true to come in and find that waiting for me. Pictures would have to follow, natch.

Eat, Pray, Love

Finished it this afternoon. LOVED it, mean it. There were several places that made me, literally, laugh out loud.

On to Ornament of the World.

April 1 • Palm Sunday

From “Behold Your Mother” in Alive and Loose in the Ordinary: Stories of the Incarnation by Martha Sterne. © 2006. Used by permission of Morehouse Publishing, Harrisburg, Pennsylvania. www.morehousepublishing.com.

Palm Sunday some years back in Atlanta, I don’t remember which. But we are doing our thing—having our annual dramatic reading of the passion story, and it is going particularly well this year. We practiced hard and it shows. The narrator is great. Jesus knows his lines. And then the part comes when Pilate says what he says every year. What do you want me to do with this man? This is the signal for the whole congregation to get in on the action. And the crowd yells, CRUCIFY HIM! CRUCIFY HIM! Bloodcurdling effect. Very satisfactory.

And while the crowd’s pretended rage is still ringing in our ears, from about two-thirds back in the pews, comes a woman’s voice bellowing. NO. NO. NO. Not my Boy. No. Don’t. Not my Boy. And then sobs throbbing through the air to break your heart.

We are appalled, deeply appalled. What had been an audience is becoming something else. What is happening? Somehow 400 observers are transformed into a body of witnesses. I crane my neck and see that someone sitting near her comforts her. Well, thank God. They look for all the world like Mary and John lost at the foot of the cross, her head collapsed on the shoulder of her pew-mate, whose name, I remember, is actually John.

We sit in silence, all of us, for a timeless time. For what had been a well-done scripted and rehearsed play has become anamnesis, has become Real Presence. And the veil of the temple is torn in two. She is there at the foot of the cross. Perhaps you would have diagnosed her as mentally ill or maybe drunk—but she is there and she is our host and takes us there too.

What if we had ushered her out? What a loss. But we didn’t and she was peculiar and beautiful and rich with gifts to give and plugged into the power like I’ve never seen before. Where else would such a woman belong on Palm Sunday during the Passion of Our Lord but in the Body of Christ?

Holy Week

Every year I promise myself a Holy Lent. I give up the appropriate item, habit, or food, and go my merry way. Every year I am disappointed come Low Sunday (the Sunday AFTER Easter) that I did not do better. Whatever better might mean. This year I did not make to Low Sunday before disappointment fell. It is here today.

What brought this on? Oh, I don't know. Could be walking out to the waiting room and seeing all of those sad little faces of the children who don't understand why the adults in their lives hurt them. Could be the news every morning of another soul gunned down in the streets in the county north of us. Could be that I am worried about Adam in Iraq.

Could be that I am realizing that perhaps God wants more of me than an item, habit, or food.

The good news here is that I have a whole week to make my Lent holy. So for this last week of Lent I propose to pray more, help more, be more.

And I wish for you a Holy Lent as well.

I have some things to tell you

I have been thinking about sparkley armpits (slow work week) and I have some other things that I think need to be clarified. Some things that I thought everyone knew but, apparently, no; these things must be put out there for the world to see and know. Or at least my office needs to know these things.

If you want to play the game, you have to dress in the uniform. That means:

no Hello Kitty purses
no crocs (I love my crocs, but I wear them at home and only at home.)
no clothes so tight I can make out the outline of your appendectomy scar
no flowers painted on your toenails
no playboy bunny ANY THING
no cleavage (boob or butt)
no flip flops with the strips of fabric tied around the straps

There are many other crimes against fashion but I am too depressed to go on with this list. The scary thing is that some of the above are all on the same person.

So now that we have covered appearance lets talk about things not to say out loud. Ever. But especially to your boss.

"Wow I am really tired, I didn't make it home til 6 this morning."
"You look really good for someone your age." Shockingly enough, this person still lives, breathes, and walks among us.
"Did I know that I was supposed to do that?"
"I am not really in the mood to work today." My personal favorite. It puts me in the mood to pull one's head off like a Barbie doll.

There are so many more that if I list them all I will just want to kill myself.

So my friends here it is: The part of the employee manual that is left out.

Ain't it the truth

Cartoon by Dave Walker. Find more cartoons you can freely re-use on your blog at We Blog Cartoons.

Help me out here people

I stopped by the drug store on the way in to work today to pick up some Tums (Chipotle - a whole 'nother story), and wandered up and down the aisles, as I am prone to do, for other items I might "need."

I found myself in front of the ladies deodorant section and I have a burning questions that must be answered. WHY do they make deodorant with sparkles in it? Do my pits really need to glisten? Is it in case I am held up by a bad robber person and when I hold my arms up said person is blinded by the sparkle of my pits and I can run away? I just don't know the answer to these questions.

It is a sad thing to be so excruciatingly unhip that I don't even know if my armpits need sparkles or not.

Clearly, I am being tested.

So I bring my happy self to work today to be greeted by two of my young therapist friends who went to DSW last night and cannot wait to show me what they bought.

I wanted to poke their eyes out with an unsharpened pencil.

This, of course, is not a very Christian response so I did not leap over my desk Uma Thurman-Kill-Bill style.

I just broke the pencils under my desk where they could not see, smiled, and told them that they had learned well little grasshoppers.

For indeed they had! One had on a pair of incredbly sassy black wedge sandals (ALMOST as sassy as my wedge heel sling backs that I am currently wearing. She is still in training.) The other had on a pair of ballet flats almost exactly like mine. Well played: when in doubt, copy your mentor.

So, while I am being tested, it is clear that I have preached the "don't buy those crappy plastic shoes and expect anyone to take you seriously" sermon long and loud enough to convert two young novices.

Let's Talk About Books!

Hardback or trade paperback or mass market paperback?
Paper backI have to REALLY REALLY want to read the book to buy it in hardback. which is usually the case so I guess I should just say hardback.

Amazon or brick and mortar?
Amazon. Yes - incredible as it sounds our local Borders (we don't have Barnes and Noble) sucks.

Barnes & Noble or Borders?
borders. I would LOVE to have Full Circle at my disposal, but alas.

Bookmark or dogear?
Bookmark hardbacks, dogear everything else.

Alphabetize by author or alphabetize by title or random?
Random sounds so much better than "all over the damn place."

Keep, throw away, or sell?
Keep. Always. Forever.

Keep dust jacket or toss it?
Keep it! What kind of uncultured savage would TOSS THE DUST JACKET?! I do tend to take the jacket off while I am reading it so I don't get it messed up.

Read with dust jacket or remove it?
Yeah, what I just said.

Short story or novel?
Usually novel. I have to be in the mood for short stories.

Collection (short stories by same author) or anthology (short stories by different authors)?
I don't care. I have both.

Harry Potter or Lemony Snicket?
Yes.

Stop reading when tired or at chapter breaks?
Both. Either. And then there have been the nights when it is neither and I must drag my happy self to work looking like something the cat coughed up. Also see later question!

“It was a dark and stormy night” or “Once upon a time”?
GACK. I am ashamed to say both

Buy or Borrow?
Buy, always. I HATE to borrow books other than the library. I must confess that I actually write in some of my books. I know. I heard the collective gasp of everyone on that confession

New or used?
Either, but if used it has to be in like-new condition. No sqicky stuff in the pages or irky smell

Buying choice: book reviews, recommendation or browse?
All of the above.

Tidy ending or cliffhanger?
Tidy endings! Cliffhangers make me feel ripped-off. Like the last chapter of the book is missing and I should get a discount, and then I feel I should write the author a letter of righeous indignation. Really.

Morning reading, afternoon reading or nighttime reading?
Usually nighttime, right before bed. IN bed. Then Steve can come move the book off me, take my glasses off, tuck me in, and turn out the light.

Stand-alone or series?
I used to like series books, but my attention span for them has waned as I've gotten older and I'm leaning more toward stand-alone stuff lately.

Favorite series?
Nancy Drew, Madeleine L'Engle's Time "trilogy", Agatha Christie's Miss Marple books (I know; I can't help it). The Lord of the Rings (HEY I liked it before it was COOL to like it)

Favorite children's book?
King Bidgood's in the Bathtub (Oh WHO knows WHAT to DO?) Ok that last part was purely for my children because that is how that particular book had to be read. Wind in the Willows - is that really a childen's book? Bruno the Beagle - that is for John Forrest. The pigeon book being read by Steve to Theo

Favorite book of which nobody else has heard?
Pigtopia by Kitty Fitzgerald

Favorite books read last year?
If "last year" means the twelve months prior to today, then: A Cooks Tour, Looking for Mary, City of Fallen Angels

Favorite books of all time?
Our Lady of the Lost and Found, Memoirs of Cleopatra and there are a bunch more but I cannot remember them all!

Least favorite book you finished last year?
Something by Sue Monk Kidd - not the Mermaid Chair or the Secret Life of Bees but something else that wants women to jump in the ocean while holdling red yarn to connect each other or some other such crap as that. The Life of Pi - hated it, Sorry Andrea!

What was the last book you finished?
City of Fallen Angels

What are you reading right now?
Eat, Pray, Love: One Woman's Search for Everything Across Italy, India and Indonesia

What are you reading next?
I have no idea.....

Salsa

There are many things of wonder here on the East Coast. Salsa, alas, is not one of them. The restaurants usually serve some weird water concoction that is in no way similar to the salsa I grew up with. Here is an incredibly easy recipe that serves a bajillion:

1 jar salsa
1 container fresh salsa (usually found over with the deli stuff)
1 small bag of frosen corn, thawed
1 can black beans rinsed and drained
cilantro if you like a lot of it in your salsa, which I do

Mix it all together and, ta da! Salsa!!

This is not as good as Tarahumara's, but really, is anything?

mr. Deity Episode 8: Mr. Deity and the Top Ten

Erin you are not the only one who thinks lists should be done with ten things listed.

Another week-end screams by

I think that we should apply for a grant worth a bazillion dollars to do a study on why the week-end flies by and the work week crawls along! I know that there is some quantum black hole where time disappears is reason for it.

I would like to report that we had a very relaxing week-end where we spent the days lounging in our new home reading bits of Proust to each other while drinking cappuccino and eating sugar cookies but it would be a complete lie.

Saturday we moved the what has now been dubbed "The Beast." Remember the big armoir in the living room that had the stereo in it? It weighs eleventy hundred pounds. Steve and some poor child from youth group started to move it and then I panicked and called in another friend (Mike Carter) to help. I thought The Beast was going to win the war, but these three finally got it moved.

What did I do? I moved any "little" stuff that was left while battling a stomach bug. Fun times were indeed not had by anyone.

Sunday I made my debut singing in the choir. It was great fun and I am glad that I joined. Next Sunday we are doing a completely sung Evensong service with the Magnificat and a Cantique. I am a little nervous about it, but I know it will be fun. We have a string quartet that will be playing with us - very cool!

After service we had a workshop on praying with Anglican prayer beads and then I had a meeting with the Jaycees about a fundraiser they want to do for the Center for Children. I think we made it home about 5:00.

Sigh - maybe next weekend.

Pray for me in the hour of my need.

As you know, I have given up frivolous spending for Lent. Most of you also know that I love shoes beyond reason.

A new DSW Shoes has opened here in town.

HOW can I be strong and resist the siren song of new shoes?

It will be a tough challenge, but one I am ready to accept.

We're DONE

Well, for all practical purposes. We still have to go get the sewing room tables and the bed frames for the guest room.

It is fabulous. It is grand. It is ALMOST like being back in Oklahoma. (Nothing is THAT grand.)

We will be posting pictures soon - as soon as we find the cord that goes from the camera to the computer.

I still hate moving.

This is the do-or-die week-end.

Pray for me in the hour of my need.

I hate moving

with a passion of a thousand firey suns. I hate the packing, the unpacking, the actualy physical exertion involved...the entire ball of wax.

Once it is done it will be grand. I will actually have my clothes in the same room that I sleep in instead of having to to upstairs to get dressed. There is MORE THAN ONE BATHROOM so no more racing Steve to see who can get through the house faster to use the ONE we have now.

sigh

I just hate the moving part.

What are you doing for Lent?

Good thing I blew major money on Monday because I have given up frivolous spending. That's right, you heard me: FRIVOLOUS SPENDING.

Snicker if you will but that is my Lenten discipline.

What qualifies as frivolous spending you ask?

Those leopard pumps THAT ARE ON SALE will not make me run faster or jump over tall buildings. They would make me even more awesome than I already am, but should one just flaunt one's awesomeness all the time to the unwashed masses? Not during Lent. Leopard pumps = frivolous.

How many shades of brown eye shadow does a body need? Realising of course that the color brown really encompasses colors from weak tea to dark chocolate. I don't think the one shade I do not possess is going to be the deciding factor in whether or not I decide to get out of bed that day (Although if I get any more hormonal....)
New eyeshadow = Frivolous

Do you see where I am headed with this? I have all the STUFF I should ever need (notice I did not say want). Surely I can make it through Lent.

If you want to buy those pumps FOR me let me know and I will tell you my size.

John Forrest has a my Space Page!

You can check it out by clicking the link at the right!

Ash Wednesday

Because I do not hope to turn again
Because I do not hope
Because I do not hope to turn
Desiring this man's gift and that man's scope
I no longer strive to strive towards such things
(Why should the aged eagle stretch its wings?)
Why should I mourn
The vanished power of the usual reign?
Because I do not hope to know again
The infirm glory of the positive hour
Because I do not think
Because I know I shall not know
The one veritable transitory power
Because I cannot drink
There, where trees flower, and springs flow, for there is nothing again

Because I know that time is always time
And place is always and only place
And what is actual is actual only for one time
And only for one place
I rejoice that things are as they are and
I renounce the blessed face
And renounce the voice
Because I cannot hope to turn again
Consequently I rejoice, having to construct something
Upon which to rejoice

And pray to God to have mercy upon us
And pray that I may forget
These matters that with myself I too much discuss
Too much explain
Because I do not hope to turn again
Let these words answer
For what is done, not to be done again
May the judgement not be too heavy upon us

Because these wings are no longer wings to fly
But merely vans to beat the air
The air which is now thoroughly small and dry
Smaller and dryer than the will
Teach us to care and not to care
Teach us to sit still.

Pray for us sinners now and at the hour of our death
Pray for us now and at the hour of our death.

- T. S. Eliot

Those pesky life lessons, Chapter Bajillion

OK - last night we went to a cocktail party over in Prince Frederick. It was a fund-raiser for the United Way hosted by one of the Board Members of my organization. I looked smashing as did my date if I may say so myself - but I digress.

At this soiree, there was a silent auction - you know where you write down your name or an assigned number and how much you are willing to bid on an item. Since the event was hosted by one of my Board Members I felt compelled to write my number on several bid sheets because, after all, I was certainly going to be out-bid by the end of the evening!

One of the items I bid on was an under-counter wine refrigerator. I bid $200. The next bid was $250 so I knew that all was good and I had no worries.

WRONG!!

The gentleman that bid $250 changed his mind (after I left the party and right before the bid sheets were collected) so I am now the proud owner of an under-counter wine refrigerator that holds 24 bottles and 2 six packs.

Moral of the story: Don't bid even if it is politically correct.

Indeed!

What Ann Michelle Seely Means

A is for Adaptable N is for Nerdy N is for Neat M is for Magical I is for Impressive C is for Cultured H is for Hip E is for Expressive L is for Luscious L is for Loud E is for Elegant S is for Shocking E is for Exuberant E is for Exquisite L is for Logical Y is for Young

What Does Your Name Mean?

Meanwhile, back at the farm...

We finally have electricity! For those of you who have escaped my incessant whining about our lack of heat, let me bring you up to date on the saga that was our Valentine's Day.

On Wednesday (Valentine's Day) at 5:00 a.m. our electricity went out after a huge ice storm in our little corner of the universe. Steve, worker bee that he is, had already showered and gone to work. I, alas, had not. Due to the ice, my office did not open until 10:00 that morning. I went, unwashed and dirty haired, to work that day to escape the freezing temperatures.

When it became clear that we were not going to have electricity restored, I started calling around to get a hotel room. Right. So did everyone else who did not have any electricity. I called, I kid you not, about 18 hotels only to be told that there were no rooms available. Being the resourceful kind of folk that we are, we slept on the floor of Steve's office. Happy freaking Valentine's Day.

The next day, I went to work (even more unkempt and dirtier haired) because we still did not have electricity. Steve, knowing that my unkempt level was waaaaaay past the red zone booked us a room at a hotel. Bob went to stay with the family who keeps him while we are in Oklahoma. He had a blast AND was warm!

So we get to the hotel and of course the first think I do is shower because I am soo past the "eeewwwwwww" stage that I can hardly stand myself. I conk out at 8:00 only to awoken at 3:00 by the dulcent tones of the man in the next room having a fight with his girlfriend. Fabulous. The next morning when I got up I was a hateful mean crank of a woman who made AS MUCH NOISE AS POSSIBLE so said dummy in the next room could not sleep. It was the least I could do....legally.

Friday I go to work where my co-workers greet me with delight that I have finally taken a shower and that my hair (that had not been washed since MONDAY) finally looked semi-normal. I think my hair was in complete shock at the filth level it had attained and then the sudden washing of it 48 times to make sure that it was really clean. I mean REALLY clean.

At some point on Friday our electricity came back on, but we were afraid to turn the water on for fear that the pipes had frozen and they would burst if we did. So back to the hotel. This time all was calm and we actually slept.

Today we came home and gingerly tried out the water situation - Sweet Cracker Sandwiches we now have water too!

To celebrate we went to IKEA and bought a bunch of crap we now have to move.

We are brilliant. But we are also warm and clean!!!

WE'RE MOVING!!!

The new Seely home!

I am Chocolate Ice Cream

You Are Chocolate Ice Cream

You have a flair for the dramatic and love to party. Your personality is super strong and unique. Many people crave you constantly - while you turn a few off. You are most compatible with coffee ice cream.

What Flavor Ice Cream Are You?

Bene!

I figured out how to link other sites! Not that it was incredibly difficult, but still...

Along with all of the absolutely fabulous blogs of family and friends, I have added a few that make me laugh on a regular basis. "Go Fug Yourself," while sounding slightly crass is a site that makes me wish that I had thought of it and that I was this witty. Poking fun at celebrities that make a bajillion more dollars than I is always fun.

"Lipstick is My Crack" is a site run by a woman around my age (OK SHE"S YOUNGER!) in Texas. She tries out all the make up/skin care/hair products she can and gives her completely non-professional opinion. Also, she is a hoot.

Ayatollah Mugsy is not only a spiritual leader - he is a pug. Enough said.

Manolo's Shoe Blog is all about the "shoeses." Again, enough said.

Hope you enjoy these sites as much as I do!

Mamma Mia!

I am beyond excited...

humbled, amazed, and completely GOT!

Ayatollah Mugsy has a link on his site to ME!!!!

If I knew how I would link to HIS site so you could see MINE listed, but I am clearly not a cool as he is!

Buono Sera (Good evening)

Last night I learned how to ask where the shoe shop is. After I learn how to get directions to the bathroom I really do feel like I am set to go. Shoes, wine, and the bathroom. What more does a girl need while in Italy?

Buon Giorno

The Italian classes have started! The teacher is about 128 years old and a hoot! If I drive you crazy showing off my "vast" knowledge, all I can say is, "Mi dispiace!" (I'm sorry).

We will be spending 5 days in Venice, 2 in Florence and 3 in Rome. HOW can I see it all in that short amount of time? Of course, this is assuming that I save my pennies and actually get there! It will all be so che bella.

Arrivederci mi familigia et amico!

What I wore to be a Marshall

No sash - just a name tag that had a big black ribbon hanging off of it that had "MARSHALL" printed in gold down it.

It was so close to being a sash.

I am a bad blogger

I have neglected my blog for far too long. Please accept my apologies - I am sure that you have all been just waiting on pins and needles for the next pearls of wisdom and wit to by typed out for all to read here on my little blog.

Steve's stint adventure went well - two more so he is fully spring loaded (for those of you that do not get the joke: the stints, at first glance, look like the spring out of a ball point pin). He of course went to work today but promised that he would go home if he got too tired.

Washington DC finally got hit with some snow. Darn it, it was not enough to close down anything - just wet and ugly. I was really hoping for a snow day, but alas. The schools were already closed for some random teacher meeting thing so the roads were pretty uninhabited this morning.

This coming Saturday I am volunteering at our Diocesan convention to be held at the National Cathedral. I will be a voting marshall. While sounding very important, I have the feeling I will be standing, Vanna-like, and saying, "This way to vote please!" The real question is: what does one wear when one is a marshall at a Diocesan Convention? Just as all roads lead to Rome, all events lead to the question, "What do I wear?"

THANKS MAUER FAMILY!!!

Now send me some cute pictures from Christmas to upload!!!

New Year's Resolutions

This year I am all about resolutions that I can keep.

I resolve to not learn how to speak Swahili. I just don't think I am going to really need it in 2007. Trust me - you will be the first to know should I be mistaken.

I have resolved to continue in my quest to not read The Odyssey in the original Greek. In fact, I don't think I am going to read it at all.

I am going to continue in my burning dislike of TO and ALL things Dallas Cowboys.

I will not take up snowboarding.

I am not going to buy a deep fat fryer.

There: Five resolutions that I think I can keep through at least February if not the entire year!

Let's remember this more than just at Christmas

The Work of Christmas
by Howard Thurman

"When the song of the angels is stilled,
When the star in the sky is gone,
When the kings and princes are home,
When the shepherds are back with their flock,
The work of Christmas begins:
To find the lost,
To heal the broken,
To feed the hungry,
To release the prisoner,
To rebuild the nations,
To bring peace among brothers,
To make music in the heart."
— The Mood of Christmas, 23

Charlie Brown Christmas

Thank you Linus - well done!

Happy Birthday to me!

Yay Steve!!!

I am a tree....of course I am

You Are a Tree

You love every part of the holidays, down to the candy canes and stockings. And you're goofy enough to put a Christmas tree ornament on your tree!

What'>http://www.blogthings.com/whatchristmasornamentareyouquiz/">What Christmas Ornament Are You?

Advent 1 Meditation

Meditation for the first week of Advent

Let's be thankful

Let's be thankful we had the Thanksgiving we did instead of one that might have been:

Steve and I woke up Thursday morning.
We could have been sleeping in a car or on the sidewalk, but we were in our nice warm house.

Steve made muffins, and checked on our dinner reservations
Lots of people went without a meal that day.

Steve had a heart attack and we called the ambulance.
How many people would not have called the ambulance because they don't have the insurance to pay for it? Or won't go to the hospital for the same reason?

The nurses and doctors at the hospital were awesome and gave Steve great care.
What if we had been some place where there is no real hospital?

Father David came right over to offer support and prayers.
Think of the countries where people are not allowed to practice their religion.

The doctors put two stents in Steve's heart and he will, most likely, be better than ever.
He might have died.

All in all, we have MUCH to be thankful for; not that our Thanksgiving didn't suck (because trust me - it did). But the alternatives are so much worse.

God is good.

All the time.

What do you want in YOUR stocking?

Now that the names have been drawn (thanks Andrea!) let the shopping begin!!

I have done a little survey here just to give everyone a hand. Copy and paste it in to the comments here so we can see what everyone has to say. I will call John and get his responses tonight.

What is your favorite color(s)? Yellow and red, but not to wear. Mostly I wear brown, caramel, and black during the winter

Favorite Candy/snack? (We know ALL about Ho-Ho’s, Steve) Not a big spiced orange fan. Love caramel!

Magazine? YES! I LOVE magazines about anything! OK mostly about food

What size sock do you wear? the normal 4 - 10 size

Hobbies? Where do I begin? Still quilting, doing some scrapbook stuff, cross stitch

What is your LEAST favorite flavor/smell? (Remember Erin’s intense hate of peaches). I cannot abide the smell of vanilla candles and/or buttercream. ACK - I feel my blood sugar rising just thinking of it!

Do you prefer to write with a pencil or pen? a .9 mechanical pencil

Are you collecting anything these days? Aren't I always? Actually I have been pretty good lately at not buying stuff. However, I always love a good snowman this time of year....

What is your favorite candle scent? Sage and Citrus, nothing too sweet. Target has a Method one that I really like - can't remember the name but it is green, and I like the blue one too. I think the blue one is clean water or something like that.

What bookstore do you go to – Borders or Barnes and Noble? Borders - alas

What else do you want us to know? I like it ALL! I love stuff!! Little frames WITH PICTURES ALREADY IN THEM would be great.

Update on the Oxy Ball

I thought that it would leave my clothes feeling funky - like there was still soap in them - but they don't. My clothes are clean and don't smell like anything at all (if you like the fresh laundry smellin' stuff it ain't happenin' here). Steve and I aren't horribly messy, so I cannot vouch for the stain removal propoerties of this product.

All and all I think I am going to keep using it!

You can't make this stuff up, people

LONDON - A 22-year-old man suffered internal injuries after lighting a small firecracker he had inserted into his buttocks, paramedics said Thursday.
The incident took place Sunday, when Britain celebrated Bonfire Night, traditionally marked with fireworks to celebrate the Guy Fawkes’ gunpowder plot to blow up Parliament in the 17th century.

The man suffered burns and other unspecified internal injuries in the incident in Sunderland, 275 miles north of London.

Katherine Shenton, a spokeswoman for the North East Ambulance Service, said a caller had phoned in that the victim was bleeding after the firecracker exploded.Several of the man’s friends recorded the incident on a mobile phone. The blurry images show a man bent over with his pants down and a white flash as the firecracker explodes.

Because that is what friends are for - letting you do something this stupid and then taking pictures of you while you are doing it.

Severe Shoe Lust

These super fantastic shoes could be mine - if I didn't make my car payment for three months.

sigh.

Consumer Testing

Hope this picture looks better on your computer than it does mine!

Anyhoo....I am trying the Oxi-Clean detergent ball. You put this big ball of detergent in a little sock thing and then in the rubber ball. Just "toss" it into the washer where it can stay for 25 washes. What about the rinse cycle you ask? You don't have to take it out for that. I have no idea how or if it works but I am going to find out!!

Thank God - I was worried I was becoming a Yankee

Your Linguistic Profile:

45% General American English

30% Dixie

15% Yankee

5% Upper Midwestern

0% Midwestern

What Kind of American English Do You Speak?

Fortunately, I only have to figure out how to stomp out 15%.

Screw the Light Bulb Event

"Bobbi Baldus will be hosting the annual “Screw the Bulb” event at Wills Park on November 8 and 9 at 6:30 to replace bulbs in the Christmas street lights. Please mark your calendars and come out to help."

This is the text of an actual e-mail that I received this afternoon. Yes - I am going to attend.

Good times here in the shadow of our nation's capital.

Snit update

Still here.

Not quite as bad, but definately still here.

The no good very bad mood

It is Halloween - one of the best holidays EVER - and I am in a no good, very bad, mood.

I am having a little bit of homesickness (Please do not say "Well, you are the one who decided to move." You might draw back a bloody stub. Just feel I should warn you.) I am a little bored with my job (I do not have enough to do to keep my busy on a day to day basis). I am tired of living 30 minutes away from everyone and fighting the mice (but I love that we have no neighbors, that it is so quiet, etc).

So apparently I am having what is commonly referred to as a "snit." Let us hope that it leaves as quickly as it arrived!

What the...?

I was going to change my template and I guess I pushed too many buttons and have deleted some of my posts.

Another victory for the computer!

Random-ness at it's finest

OK this is kind of random, but stay with me folks.

I read a blog that is called "Lipstick is my Crack" and the gal who writes it swears by this stuff. So I decided to plunk down some $$ and try some.

I am in love.

OK - it takes your makeup off, even eye makeup, really well, rinses off beautifully, and leaves your face feeling fantastic . But the stuff smells incredible. I want to run out and buy a baguette to dunk in it.

You can get it online through the company that makes it (DHC) Sephora carries it (I think), not sure about Ulta. I highly recommend it and thank Mrs. Badger for the great tip.

That is all.

No new song

Sadly, the Sugarloaf Craft Fair did not rate it's own song. I know. No one was more disappointed than I.

To salvage the day, we drove on up to Hagerstown to the Outlet Mall!! Steve bought some jeans and some shoes. I bought a kit that turns a pumpkin into a spider. The real thrill of the trip was the autumnal (don't you just love that word?) colors we enjoyed along the way.

So. To all my children who are reading this blog: are we drawing names this year like last year? Let me know what you think because we need to begin to commence on that if we are.

National Acolyte Festival

And you thought you had fun this week-end! Steve and I took our acolytes (ages 5 through 16) to the National Acolyte Festival this past Saturday. They participated with the other 1990 acolytes - no I am not kidding that is really how many where there - in a Eucharist celebrated by our own Bishop Chane. The procession took a really long time as you might imagine! The youngest acolyte there was four and the oldest (in a wheelchair) was 87. It was very cool.

Sunday we went to church and then to the La Plata Rotary Club Annual Lobster Fest. It's true - we know how to live. Next week-end we are going to a Craft Festival that has the potential to rival our own Affair of the Heart. I am thrilled. Steve is trying to come up with a new song to sing at the top of his lungs for this one since he cannot sing his signature "Affair of the Heart" aria. I 'll keep you posted on that one.

Alas, back to the real world.

Just in case you had not heard, we had a wonderful time!! I agree with Patterson that Key West is awesome! The weather was great, the hotel was lovely, and the food was outstanding. I have completely fulfilled quota of grouper for the year.

Below are some pictures of the trip. As my little friend Abby would say: "Enjoy"

Here is the sunset from the pool at our hotel. Not a bad view!

Sorry that the picture is not better. This is Odie. Odie screams all the time. Odie disappeared the last day we were there. I think that the people in the room closest to Odie "done him in" as Eliza Doolittle would say. Justifiable in my opinion.

These turtles were the closest thing I saw to an alligator. I confess: I was deeply disappointed we did not see an alligator. We did, however, see Key Deer which are about the size of dogs. I decided that some cosmic twist had turned the deer into the predators, therefore, they had eaten all the alligators. Steve disputes this theory.

The pool at the Hyatt in which we stayed. There really was no beach per se. There was a little bity teeny tiny place that had 6 chaise lounges that they called the beach. We never got to sit in those lounges because someone was, apparently, always up at 4 a.m. to go "save" them all. Whatever. The waitress didn't go serve drinks on the "beach" so we were far far better off where we were.

The southern-most point in the continental U.S. I have no idea if there is a southern-most point that is not part of the continental U.S. Or where the nothern-most point is. This is all I got for ya.

Mile marker "0". The end, or beginning of the line as it were.

Don't forget!

Steve and I are leaving for Florida on Wednesday! We will be in Naples Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday morning. Friday afternoon through Tuesday we will be in Key West. We are planning a lot of time on the beach watching for scenes like the one above.

Steve's Surgery

As you all know - Steve's surgery went well. The Doctor told me that he took out more tissue than he originally thought he would have to only because there was more tissue to take.

Steve had a pretty rough night last night and I keep hearing that tomorrow, Friday, will be the worst day so I am running out to get a triple supply of Ho-Ho's just in case.

Thanks for all your love and prayers!

PS - the first thing he did when he got home after surgery was have a Ho-Ho and a pain pill.

My latest obesssion

I took a card making class on Saturday and the instructor had this cool little machine called a Xyron.

IT TURNS ANTHING INTO A STICKER.

I know, I was pretty excited myself. Anyway, I rushed wildly out and purchased the 1 1/2 inch wide version today and have run amock turning ribbon, feathers, whatever into a sticker! You just shove it in one end and it comes out a sticker on the other end!. Bob, alas, would not fit because I really wanted to stick His Goofiness on a wall somewhere to keep him from "helping" me.

The 1 1/2 inch wide Xyron is $9.99 and the replacement cartridges are $4.99. You can make your stickers as long as you want, but with this version, they can only be 1 1/2 inches wide. Of course they make wider sizes, and the cost runs up to $120.00, but I felt starting small was the best course of action.

PS - I bought the purple sparkley one. I am kinda over pink.

Ernesto - the real deal

OK - so we are in a state of Declared Emergency!!!

It is rather exciting I must say. I understand how people might think, "This is really cool! I am going to stay right here in my house and watch the 300 MPH winds go by because I am invincible!! The rain won't come in MY house. The wind won't take of MY roof!"

However, one must consider the possibility that the electricity might actually go off and you will not be able to watch "Dukes of Hazard" reruns while cars whip around your snug little abode. No electricity means that your beer will get warm in your 'frig and the whole experience will be one great big buzz kill. Bummer. Perhaps you should have gone with the nice National Guard people on their boat when they came by to pick you up. Hindsight is so 20/20.

We in Southern Maryland are not facing 300 MPH winds, only a deluge of an estimated one inch of rain per hour. I am prepared. There is the possibility that we might not have phones and that the cell phones won't work because of the storm system. Do not worry. We will be fine. We will call as soon as we can.

We are not watching Dukes of Hazard.

College Football starts THURSDAY!

Since Ernesto is heading for the DC area, I will be taking advantage of the rain keeping me in and forcing me to watch copious amounts of college football through my eyelids.

Apehangers

Here are the pretty policemen that escorted the ride. When they came to set the route up, the "ladies" in the front office nearly had a cow about how cute they are. Whatever. One had his hand on my shoulder and I had to warn him that the stud taking the picture is my husband. That certainly made them straighten up!

This my friends is a Harley that is mounted onto the all about 15 feet off the floor at Apehangers. The "deocrations" hanging off said bike are bras. Apparently, some of the female persuasion (one can hardly call them ladies) dance on the bar, take off said lingerie and toss it onto the bike. There is another bike exactly like it on the opposite wall similarly adorned. I did not dance on the bar; however two of my board members did. Fortunately they did not add to the collection on the bikds. I think I would have fainted and fallen in right then.

Project #1

I spent the morning at Material Girls learning how to properly embroider on terry cloth. It truly is more difficult that it sounds! There are all of those little loopies to consider...

Anyway....This was the design that we put on our towels. It is difficult to see, I think, because the flash washed so much of the color out it. It is supposed to be a duck in a bikini. I know. Next to the duck it was supposed to say, " No...I am not Julia Roberts, but I get that a lot." I decided I just wanted my name, thanks.

This is on the top of the towel and then, after we cut another towel in half and sewed one half to the back of the top and the other half into pockets, it is a terry cover for a lounge chair. I am doing another one in yellow with my monogram in periwinkle (to match my new tankini!) and will post that when I am finished.

Back upstairs to sew some more....

I really wanted to be Halle Berry's character....

You Are Iceman

You tried to live a normal life, but it just wasn't possible A bit of a slacker, you rather tell jokes than cultivate your powers Powers: turning self and others into ice, making ice weapons, becoming nearly invisible

Which of the X-Men Are You?

Well Duh!

Your Brain is 80% Female, 20% Male

Your brain leans femaleYou think with your heart, not your headSweet and considerate, you are a giverBut you're tough enough not to let anyone take advantage of you!

What Gender Is Your Brain?

While the cat is away the mouse will...Sew?

Steve and John left for Seattle yesterday and I received a call at 1:36 a.m. that they had arrived safely. YAY! I know that they will have a blast. If they just don't scare poor Luka to death....

So - while the manly men are off in testosterone heaven I am going to sew like a woman possessed! I bought a dress pattern yesterday (I know, I was shocked as well) that I want to try out and a pattern for a top that looks like it is a wrap but it is not. I don't trust those wrap dresses and tops to stay where they need to! So we will call this a "faux" wrap (sounds so much better than pretend). I am also going to a class at Material Girls on Saturday morning to learn more about my embroidery machine. WOO HOO!

I have lost a whopping 8 pounds in three weeks and am feeling quite sassy. To reward myself (like I need an excuse) , I did a twirl through the mall yesterday and found a cute dress that I could actually afford! It was on sale for $49! It has a "faux" wrap top that is a little too decollete for day time, but, as Erin so wisely pointed out, I can wear a pretty camisole that peeks out and be good to go. (Thanks Erin!)

Next time I post I hope I can report great things from the sewing room!!!

Pretty Clothes Continued

I have received my patterns for the pencil skirt (and two others that I am not yet ready to reveal quite yet). Today I bought some lovely dark denim and plan to whip my first skirt out tonight.

I am feeling so clever that if I had a tail I would be a weasel!

Mr. Simpson Goes to Maryland

Monday, John and I went to Annapolis. We toured "Ego Row" to

see all the boats and here is Annapolis harbour. We wanted to

ask some of these boats for a ride, but cooler heads prevailed.

In case you ever need to know this bit of trivia: The Naval Academy's

Mascot is named Bill. Here are John and Bill. I have a friend who has

a niece at the Academy, and part of her duties are to take care of

the real live Bill that goes to the games.

Here is the altar at the Naval Academy Chapel.

My picture captures nothing of how beautiful it really is

Here is the back fo the Naval Academy Chapel.

Again, my pictures do not do it justice.

Saturday we were going to go to Gettysburg, but we decided in the beach instead! Here is the entrance to the boardwalk, which is about a mile and a half long.
John surveys the Atlantic - actually I think he is surveying all the girls in their almost non-existent bathing suits!
OK - you know those pictures you see of the sandcastles that you wonder if are real? Well, we have seen them live and in person so we can assure you that they are, indeed, real.

Where have all the pretty clothes gone?

OK, let me clarify: where have all the pretty clothes that I can afford gone? They are certainly now where to be found in my end of the woods.

Drastic measures must be taken.

I have ordered two yards of the print to the left to make my own pencil skirt.

I can see this with a brown twin set with a lovely pink scark tied Parisianne style at the neck, perhaps pearls, or a great big pink flower in a nod to Sex and the City. Let us not forget the chocolate brown slingbacks that will complete the look.

The best part? I already have the twin set and shoes!!

I say we rise up and band together against the ugliness that is the fashion available to us. Betsy Ross patterns has the perfect pencil skirt pattern which I plan on using until my fingers bleed from sewing in zippers.

THANKS MOM FOR SHOWING ME IT CAN BE DONE!!!

Way to go, Dumb***

NORMAN --- Quarterback Rhett Bomar is one of two players who have been dismissed from the Oklahoma football team, according to several sources.

Oklahoma released a statement confirming that two players had been dismissed by the team, but did not identify them. The school said the players violated NCAA rules by working at a private business and taking "payment over an extended period of time in excess of time actually worked."
Bomar, who set an Oklahoma freshman record with 2,018 passing yards after taking over as the Sooners' starter in the second game last season, was one of the two players who had been permanently dismissed.

"We spend a considerable amount of time addressing our players regarding their personal conduct and the NCAA rules," head coach Bob Stoops said. "They know exactly what we expect from them. Ultimately, they have to make right decisions. The same holds true for our boosters. When they do not, the consequences are serious, and we will not tolerate this behavior.
"Our team and university actions are necessary because of the intentional participation and knowledge of the student athletes in these violations," Stoops said.

A top-rated recruit out of high school, Bomar redshirted his first season while 2004 Heisman Trophy winner Jason White completed his career. Bomar lost a quarterback competition to Paul Thompson last fall, but was named the starter after the Sooners lost to TCU in the first week.
He started Oklahoma's final 11 games and completed 54 percent of his passes, while throwing 10 touchdowns and 10 interceptions. Oklahoma finished 2005 by winning six of its final seven games, including a victory against Oregon in the Holiday Bowl.
"I firmly believe that our program is stronger than any individual player and that a championship program cannot compromise its values," Stoops said in the statement.

You know that I hate to be left out....

So I, too, have joined Weight Watchers. I am happy to report that this week I lost 2.6 pounds!!! It doesn't hurt that it is so dang hot and humid that the last thing I want to do is cook and/or eat.